All Posts,  Musings,  Opinion Pieces,  Sex Work

Please stop fucking, frolicking, and filming in accessible bathrooms!

Please stop fucking, frolicking, and filming in accessible bathrooms!

Whist I have seen this type of video a number of times in my career, recently I came across it again, and it involved lots of squirt all over everywhere. The video was made by someone I am friendly with, and I wish the people in the video no ill will, but I need to get out my thoughts on this. Warning, there’s going to be a lot of tough love.

I make it no secret that I’m a sex worker, and apart from at my job I’m pretty open about being an ambulatory wheelchair user – both manual, and electric. If I’ve been out in the chair for some time, there’s a good chance my body will hurt more, so it’s safer for me to stay in my chair, even when in the toilets.

Rolling in the bacteria

When I’m out, my wheels go everywhere I go, and thus will pickup whatever I roll through, the good and the bad. Well, the only ‘good’ thing I could roll through is glitter, and I think my partner would have opinions on that.

As well as picking everything up, wheelchairs are also rough on the hands, so a lot of people wear gloves. Sometimes I wear gloves, but most of the time I don’t because I can’t self-propel, and gloves hurt. The only time I have to self propel is in the bathroom when out, or more specifically the accessible stall. Self propelling means that my hands are extremely close to the wheels of my chair, and a lot of the time I scuff my hands on my wheels accidentally. My wheels will pick up whatever is on the floor, and though I wash my hands before and after using the loo, I still need to propel myself around the toilet stall to do so … do you see the problem? More often than not disabled people aren’t consulted when designing disabled spaces, so something as simple as sink placement can make a massive difference to how you use the toilet, and how much bacteria is transferred. Thankfully, I always have anti-bacterial hand gel on me because by the time I leave I will have picked up the bacteria I was trying to wash off. However, it’s so easy to forget how much bacteria is on your hands, and bring them to your face, or your mouth.

Wheelchair users have become ill because of the bacteria their wheels have picked up during self-propelling.

I want you to sit with that a minute.

Squirting, ejaculating, masturbating, and having sex in a bathroom stall – accessible or not will mean that someone will have to touch bodily fluids that they’ve not consented to. It might be the next person that uses it, or the janitorial staff, but someone that didn’t consent to will encounter your bodily fluids.

I must also note that I’ve seen an increase in squirting porn in the middle of the street, on an escalator, and in one case a person … leaked lube that had been in their butt all over a busy street. All the above still stands no matter the place. People will still walk, roll through, and have to clean up your bodily excretions.

Planning, Peeing, and UTIs

I plan when I pee. I’ve not exactly got it down to a science, but I’m getting there.

Why do I plan when I pee? Because accessible toilets are a rare find, and accessible toilets that aren’t occupied are an even rarer find.

If you look around online you’ll find that I’m not alone. Many disabled people that use wheelchairs measure their fluid intake because they know toilets won’t be accessible to them, some have to wear adult diapers, or have to seriously consider getting catheters fitted, because they don’t have any other options. Changing Places are aiming to change that with more accessible toilets that include hoists, so if you have a moment please go support them.

This fluid math can lead to UTIs, burning urine, and in someone with an already weakened immune system further illness. ­Thankfully, I’ve not yet had a UTI from limiting my fluid intake when out, but during the weeks I’ve been out multiple times I can feel my body warning me to drink more.

Be sensible where you shoot porn!

The next time you think about shooting porn in an accessible stall, please think again. You might be denying someone their right to use the restroom. Personally, I’ve come close to wetting myself because someone was using an accessible stall when they didn’t need to – how do I know? People that apologize profusely, look guilty, and tell me they should have used the other stalls are good tells.

The next time you think about squirting, or spreading your bodily fluids all over the stalls, please think again. Toilets are infested with germs – disabled stalls more so as they don’t get cleaned as often. Some disabled people can’t use the toilet, and need to have help changing on the floor because that’s the only flat surface. Your bodily fluids make that incredibly dangerous to their health, and because of you they might get ill.

Could you say the same thing of people that walk in there with bacteria on their shoes? Yes, but the difference is you’re actively choosing to make the situation worse.

I know this is a bit of tough love, but this is the reality. Using the accessible toilet when you don’t need to whether it’s to shoot porn, skip the line for the standard loos, or have a quickie is a form of ableism. I know I concentrated a lot on the filming/bodily fluids aspect here, because that was the inspiration, but there are so many places that block accessible loos, use them as a storage closet, and/or changing room. Please realise that it’s not okay.

Perhaps you didn’t realize all this before, and that’s okay! I know it’s really easy to overlook, or not even think about these things, as it’s a totally different perspective.

So, the next time you’re out I want you to think about what it would be like if you put your hands on everything you walk on – everything from the little branches, to gum, and bodily excretions from all different animals, and sometimes humans. Try putting yourself in someone else’s wheels.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Accessibility